Two short limericks about Matthew and Joe

A hipster called Matthew would witter
“The best sort of bathing’s in Brita:
The result of tap water
Is worse than it oughter
Be: covered in limescaley glitter!”

But Joe and friends turn up their noses
At what fey young Matthew supposes:
“There’s nothing more bracing
Then swimming while facing
A good dose of leptospirosis!”